Love dream meaning

Dreaming about
love

The complete overview of what science, psychology, and spirituality say about this dream. Drawn from Oniri data and the classic works of dream psychology.

Popularity

86/100

Appears in 1 in 27 dreams

Nightmares

Below average

of dreams about love are nightmares

Gender differences

1.4×

more common for women

1 in 261 in 35

Love in a dream can feel stronger than anything you've felt awake, and plenty of people have woken up in love with someone who doesn't exist and spent the morning half-grieving them. Dreaming about love is usually about a feeling you want more of, or a quality you're drawn to in the person you fell for, more than about that person themselves. That's true even when it's someone you know, which is a relief to people who dream of loving a colleague, a friend or an ex.

Who you loved, and how it went, changes the reading. Falling for a stranger is a different dream from meeting your first love again, and being loved back is a different dream from loving someone who looks straight through you. Your waking love life counts too, since a dream of love during a lonely stretch and one in the first weeks of a relationship come from very different places.

The dream dictionary

Dreaming about love is usually about a feeling you want more of in your life, or a quality you're drawn to in the person you fell for, more than about that person themselves. Falling for a stranger often points to a side of yourself you're getting to know, while a first love or an ex points to an old feeling stirred up by something now.

Emotional profile

The emotions usually associated with dreaming about love.

Emotion families

Compared with the average dream

Joy+57%

Love+73%

Peace+24%

Unease−5%

Fear−11%

Anger−6%

Sadness+11%

Emotions that stand out

Love4.8×Desire3.7×Admiration3.2×

Related dream symbols

Other symbols that often appear together with love in dreams.

ActionsKissingDreaming about kissing someone usually points to a wish for closeness, or to a quality in that person you'd like more of in your own life.

PeopleGirlfriendDreaming about your girlfriend usually reflects where you feel the relationship is going and how sure you are of your place in it.

PeopleBoyfriendDreaming about your boyfriend usually reflects how secure the relationship feels to you right now, and what you want from him that you may not have said.

ThemesSexDreaming about sex is one of the most common dreams there is, and it's often just desire, the body doing what it does during sleep.

PeopleYour exDreaming about your ex usually means something from that relationship is still being worked through, like a feeling, a lesson or a hurt, more than that you want them back.

ThemesWeddingDreaming about a wedding usually points to a commitment you're making or a big change you're stepping into, in love, at work or in how you see yourself.

What dreaming about love means

Love in dreams works a little like hunger, in that it tells us what we need (often before we've admitted it). Four readings cover most of these dreams.

A feeling you want more of

The simplest reading is that you miss the feeling. If you're single, in a relationship that has gone quiet, or just busy and tired, a dream can hand you the rush of being in love for a night. It's worth noticing what kind of love it was, whether that was excitement, safety, being understood or being desired, because that's what you're short of.

A quality you're drawn to

The person you loved in the dream often stands for a quality, like confidence, kindness, freedom or a sense of humor. What did you love about them? Was it something you'd like more of in your days, or something you'd like to be? Dreams of loving a celebrity work this way more often than not.

A new part of you

Some love dreams are about falling for a side of yourself you're only beginning to know. They tend to come at turning points, a new career, a move or recovering from something, when a different version of you is taking shape. The stranger you fell for may be that version, met for the first time.

An old feeling stirred up

A first love, an old crush or an ex in a love dream is usually about something now that has woken up an old feeling. It might be a song, a smell, a birthday or simply a quiet patch in your current relationship. These dreams don't mean you should get in touch, but the feeling from back then usually has something to tell you about now.

Dreaming about falling in love

Falling in love in a dream, the slow build or the sudden rush, is about openness. It often comes when you're ready for something new (not always a relationship) or when life has started to feel exciting again after a flat stretch. If you fell for someone you know, the dream may be showing you an attraction you hadn't let yourself notice. But it's just as likely to be about a quality of theirs you admire, and the morning-after confusion is normal.

Dreaming about falling in love with a stranger

This is the most haunting love dream, and the one people talk about for days. The stranger has no history, so the dream is free to make them exactly what you need. Jung had a name for this figure (more on him below), and read his way, the stranger is often a part of your own mind showing up in the form of someone you could love. If you can, write down everything about them, how they looked, how they spoke and what they made you feel, before it fades.

Dreaming about your first love

First love is usually about who you were when you felt it, young, hopeful, unguarded. Dreaming of it years later often means you miss that version of yourself more than the person. It turns up around big birthdays, after a breakup, or when your current life feels very grown-up and serious. And if you met them again in the dream and felt nothing, that's usually a sign you've made peace with the past.

Dreaming about someone you love

A partner, a child, a parent or a close friend in a love dream is often simple. They're on your mind, and the dream shows you how much they matter. But if they were distant, leaving or in danger, the dream is about being afraid to lose them. And if they were loving in a way they aren't in waking life, you may be wishing for more from them, or noticing a closeness you've stopped seeing.

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Dreaming about making love

People search for the biblical meaning of this dream, so it's worth saying that the Bible has a whole book of love poetry, the Song of Songs, which includes the line "I sleep, but my heart waketh".^[2] In dreams, making love with tenderness is usually about intimacy and union, closeness to a person or to a part of your life. It sits next to dreams about sex, which have their own page, but the love dream puts the weight on the feeling more than the act.

Dreaming about love that isn't returned

Loving someone who doesn't love you back, in a dream, is about feeling unseen. It often mirrors a real situation, though not always a romantic one. A boss who never praises you, a friend who doesn't call back or a parent you can't please can all show up as an unreturned love. Where are you giving more than you get? And does that person know?

Dreaming about love according to Jung and Freud

Jung gave the figure you fall for a name, and Freud explains why it's so often a slightly odd choice.

Jung: the stranger you fall for

Jung's names for it were anima (the feminine figure in a man's dreams) and animus (the masculine one in a woman's), a person of the other sex who carries the side of you that you haven't lived.^[1] When you fall for a stranger in a dream, that's often the figure you've met. Jung saw these encounters as a chance to get to know that unlived side, and Man and His Symbols describes how people project the figure onto a real person.

Freud: the wish and the day before

Freud held that a dream fulfils a wish, and a love dream is the plainest case: you wanted to be loved, noticed or touched, and the dream obliged for a night.^[6] His other rule was to start from the day before, so when the person you loved was an odd choice (a colleague, a friend of your partner), he would ask where you'd seen them lately, because a dream borrows a face from the day and puts the wish behind it. Freud gave no reading of love itself, so this applies his ideas to it.

The biblical and spiritual meaning of love in dreams

The Bible has its own dream line about love in the Song of Songs, above, and its best-known description of love in a letter.

Love in 1 Corinthians

Paul's letter to the Corinthians gives the Bible's best-known description of love, patient and kind, keeping no record of wrongs.^[3] If your love dream felt spiritual, it may be worth asking whether it was about that kind of love, the steady kind, more than the rush.

Questions to ask about your love dream

Dreams follow what we care about by day,^[5] and love is near the top for most people. A few questions help find what this dream is about.

Who did you love, and did you know them?
What exactly did you love about them?
Was the love returned?
Did the feeling stay with you after you woke?
What's missing in your life right now that the dream gave you?

Oniri asks you what the person was like and how it felt to love them before reading your dream, so the reading starts where yours did.

Frequently asked questions

Can you really fall in love with someone in a dream?

The feeling can be completely real, and many people wake up in love with a person who doesn't exist, the glow lasting hours or even days. That's because the emotion is produced by your own brain, just as it is when you're awake. The person in the dream is usually a mix of people and wishes, which is why the feeling often says more about what you want than about who.

Does dreaming about someone mean they're thinking about you?

There's no evidence that it does, though it's a popular belief. Dreaming about someone means they're on your mind, or that they stand for something you've been thinking about. If you're hoping they feel the same, the dream won't tell you, but it can tell you how much you care.

Is it bad to dream of falling in love with someone other than my partner?

No, and it's very common. It rarely means you want to leave. It usually points to a quality the dream person had (attention, excitement, calm) that you're missing, or to something in yourself you'd like more of. It can be a useful prompt to bring more of that into the relationship you have.

Quick Analysis

Your dream seems to reflect feelings of fear, paranoia, and trust issues, particularly around friends and social situations. Running around the restaurant could symbolise an attempt to escape or avoid situations where you feel threatened or uncomfortable. The presence of your family and boyfriend may point to how much their support and protection matter to you.

The moment you confronted the girl who took your money and found common ground in the same bands suggests a desire for resolution, and a hope that conflict can give way to understanding.

Questions

In the dream you were constantly moving, running through the restaurant, never quite settling anywhere. When you woke up, did that restlessness feel familiar to anything happening in your life right now?

Yeah, I’ve been job-hunting for two months and it feels like I can never switch off or relax.

93/1000

You confronted the girl who took your money, and yet you discovered you liked the same bands. Is there someone you’re in conflict with who you also feel an unexpected closeness to?

My older sister. We argue about everything, but she’s also the only one who really gets me.

91/1000

Your family and your boyfriend appeared as protectors in the dream. Right now, do you feel able to lean on them, or is their support something you find yourself missing?

Mostly yes, though I haven’t actually told them how stressed I’ve been lately.

78/1000